RIACollections: A Thought Catalog

Good Day, World!

It is another day on the RIA Collections planet and I thought it would be fitting to start the first blog of the year diving into of the biggest challenges I have faced in life: the fear of failure.

This topic has been on my mind lately and comes up a lot on social media.

There are countless platitudes, motivational quotes, and advice on how to tackle the fear of failure, but even with all of that knowledge and readings, I have still found myself wrestling with the crippling grip of this fear. Let’s explore this together.

What is the Fear of Failure?

The fear of failure also known as Atychiphobia is an irrational and persistent fear of not succeeding. It is an insecurity that negatively affects one’s thoughts, emotions, and most definitely behaviors.

For me, fear of failure often manifests in procrastination and avoidance of doing tasks. If you’ve ever delayed a task or doubted yourself, you might also recognize these patterns. Reflect on the questions below to see if you can relate:

Signs You May Have a Fear of Failure

1. Do you compare yourself to others and criticize your own work?
   • You may sometimes compare your work or self to others and make criticisms. These criticisms may be your inner voice or some other voice (pay attention next time). These type of thoughts usually offer a false steady reminder that you may not be good enough.
2. Do you talk yourself out of trying new things?
   • You have ideas you have never tried and easily talk yourself out of trying things.
   • Great ideas may stay untested because of the “what ifs” in your mind.
3. Are you overly concerned about what others think?
   • You worry what others might think about you or are overly concerned about how you may be perceived.
   • Fear of judgment can hold you back from putting yourself out there.
4. Do you make self-defeating comments?
   • You might even make statements out loud to people that suggests you do not believe your idea, plan, or whatever it is will work.
   • Statements like “It probably won’t work anyway” reveal a lack of belief in your ideas.
5. Do you think in extremes, like black-and-white outcomes?
   • You might think in a very black and white way, not always considering the grey areas. This type of thinking narrows the possibilities of outcomes and limits your perspective.
6. Do you procrastinate on tasks, big or small?
   • You procrastinate on important and not so important tasks, those delays might be a way of avoiding the fear of a less-than-perfect result.

There are likely many more illustrations of what fear of failure can look like, but focus on these six for now. Take time to reflect and write about how you relate to these statements.

Being afraid to fail is human, so remember to approach these questions with loving kindness and self-compassion.

It is okay to fail, as long as you try again

Now that you know what the fear of failure is, how can you overcome it?

As with many things in life, time and practice are key factors in success. Overcoming fear doesn’t happen overnight. It is a journey of consistent, intentional steps, and decision making.

Six Ways to Overcome the Fear of Failure

1. Take Small Risks
   • Start with manageable challenges. Go from 0 – 10% risk, then scale up. Each small win builds confidence and encourages you to take bigger steps.
   • After 0 – 10, you could scale 10 – 30% in terms of risk taking. Either way, push yourself. Embrace discomfort.
2. Identify and set SMART goals
   • Figure out what you want to achieve, then break down those goals into specific targets that are:
     • Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, Time-bound (SMART)
   • Set 1 month, 3 month, 6 month goals to stay focused and track progress.
3. Practice Positive Affirmations
   • A mantra or affirmation practice can help with a confidence boost
   • Create daily mantras to boost your confidence. Remind yourself: “I am capable. I am growing. I can succeed.”
4. Challenge Negative Thoughts
   • If you think “What is the worst that could happen?”, then also ask yourself, “What is the best that could happen?”
   • If you think, “What if I fail?” also ask, “What if I succeed?”
   • If you make statements that you won’t succeed, make other statements that you will.
   • You can also replace self-doubt with affirmations like, “I have what it takes to improve and learn.”
5. Learn From Failure
   • If you do fail or perform lower than expected, honor the emotional experience then figure out what you can change, adjust, or improve on. Mistakes are opportunities to grow stronger.
6. Enjoy the Journey
   • I think sometimes we focus so much on the end product, we forget that the journey we took getting there is also valuable.
   • Success isn’t just the end result— the process of getting there is a form of success. Celebrate your efforts and the lessons learned along the way.

Let’s Embrace Our Fears

We can do this! Let us embrace our fears, accept them even, and begin doing things in spite of being afraid.

“People think about the word ‘fearless’ to mean without fear. I see it to actually mean ‘with fear but you do it anyway’.”

Luvvie Ajayi Jones

It’s okay to feel fear, but don’t let it stop you from trying!

I’d love to hear from you!

Share in the comments below about how you recognized your fear of failure and your journey in overcoming it. Let’s support and inspire each other on this journey.

Thank you for reading.

— RIA Collections